Market reference note: This article draws on materials from both Korea and the United States. Country-specific information is marked as 🇰🇷 Korea or 🇺🇸 U.S. in the text below.
At some point, didn't you start introducing yourself as 'So-and-so's daughter,' 'So-and-so's son,' or simply 'the person who takes care of my mother'? Caregiving begins with love, but as time goes on, that role can quietly overshadow your own identity. This is not a matter of weak willpower or insufficient filial devotion. Researchers call it 'role engulfment'—a quiet phenomenon that any caregiver may face.
🇺🇸 U.S. According to a 2025 report from AARP and the National Alliance for Caregiving (NAC), there are currently 63 million family caregivers in the United States, representing one out of every four adults, an increase of approximately 20 million since 2015. 🇰🇷 Korea According to data from the National Health Insurance Service, as of 2024, the number of people recognized as requiring long-term care has exceeded 1.165 million, and the actual number of family caregivers managing this care at home is far larger. As these numbers grow, so do the caregivers quietly losing themselves.
Researchers have long studied what happens when connections outside the caregiving role are severed. Hobbies disappear without announcement, plans with friends are repeatedly postponed, and professional accomplishment fades to the background. 🇺🇸 U.S. According to research on Alzheimer's caregivers published in The Gerontologist, caregivers disconnected from roles outside of care showed lower self-esteem and distinct signs of depression. This is not burnout; it is a matter of identity loss. 🇺🇸 U.S. If burnout is the depletion of energy, identity loss is the blurring of the very sense of 'who am I.'
🇺🇸 U.S. In a 2023 survey by AARP and S&P Global, 67% of working family caregivers reported difficulty balancing work and caregiving, 27% reduced their hours from full-time to part-time, and 16% gave up promotion opportunities. Career is more than just income. For many, a profession was the foundation of self-perception as a 'growing person.' When that sense disappears, a void opens in one's identity. 🇰🇷 Korea Korea faces the same challenge. In a 2024 survey by the National Mental Health Center of the Ministry of Health and Welfare, the percentage reporting severe stress increased by more than 10 percentage points, from 36.0% in 2022 to 46.3% in 2024. As the caregiving role expands, the space for oneself shrinks—a reality reflected in the numbers.
So what can you do? First, start by giving yourself a name again. What do you enjoy right now? Was there something you enjoyed before caregiving? Even very small things count. One book, a 20-minute walk, an old song. Second, step away from conversations where you introduce yourself only as a 'caregiver.' Talking about other subjects becomes a practice in rediscovering yourself. Third, 🇺🇸 U.S. if you are a Korean caregiver in the United States, you can look for caregiver support groups run by local senior centers or Korean community centers, and 🇰🇷 Korea in Korea, local Dementia Care Centers and Mental Health Welfare Centers operate family caregiving support programs.
For you as a caregiver to be healthy and to know who you are means you can be with your elderly loved one longer and more fully. Caregiving is not about erasing yourself, but about being present while maintaining yourself. Protecting your identity is not a selfish choice—it is the most realistic choice for sustainable caregiving.
Sources: AARP and National Alliance for Caregiving (NAC), Caregiving in the US 2025 / AARP and S&P Global, Working Caregivers Survey 2023 / Ministry of Health and Welfare National Mental Health Center, 2024 National Mental Health Knowledge and Attitude Survey / Ministry of Health and Welfare, 2024 Status of Elderly Welfare Facilities / Skaff & Pearlin, The Gerontologist 1992 (role engulfment research, NIH PubMed) / SuperLocal Project and Korea Institute for Health and Social Affairs, 2022 Long-Term Care Status Survey Research Report 2023.
Note: This article was compiled by AI from the sources cited above. We strive for accuracy, but for decisions about your specific situation, please confirm the latest guidance from a professional or the relevant agency.